What grown individual decides to drink so much alcohol that they regress back to their childish ways all in the name of fun?
Any responsible adult certainly wouldn’t partake in a night of alcohol induced fun, that leads to a headache, dehydration, and wasting a half day, just to sleep it off. And then do it again, as if not learning the first time.
Just stroll into any restaurant/bar establishment at 8:30 p.m. in the resort town I call home and you will find yourself surrounded by the lunatics.
If I said "It feels just like yesterday," then, yes, that is an accurate statement, because yesterday is when it started. The fun of last night is spilling over into the early morning hours.
The clock reads 3:34 a.m. and the party is winding down. The unwelcomed male voices fade away and all I hear is the clamor in the kitchen. The drunchies are in full force and the water bottles are being filled to the brim to ward off the much anticipated hangover.
Comfortably tucked in my bed, spooning my dog, while my husband spoons me, my daughters decided to host an after party and invite two boys they met at a club to our home. I contemplate getting out of bed to join the festivities, when all I really want is to tell them to shut the hell up!
The non-Alcohol Induced Night at the Club
Before I get bereted for bad parenting I need to explain… My daughters are of age, 26 and 23, both single, and live independently. They were visiting us for the weekend and I accompanied them for a night out on the town.
My options for the evening were:
hang with my husband, his new step-brother (who happens to be his best friend) and my father-in-law with his new bride
retire to bed at 8:30 p.m.
drive my daughters to a local club to hear a choice of a live band or DJ, dance, and people watch
What would you choose?
I live in a vacation community with lots of night life. The last few years my husband and I did not take advantage of the after hour fun our town has to offer. We both have aged out of the party scene, but haven’t shunned it. When the right mix of friends get together or our daughters visit I will partake in the party lifestyle as a sober woman.
The Alcohol Induced Lunacy
What I witnessed that night was a bunch of lunatics on the dance floor having a good time. I have nothing against lunatics. My daughters and many of my friends fall into that category. A group of people binging on alcohol and enjoying the music.
When visiting Nashville with my girlfriends who like to let loose and binge on alcohol or an evening on the town with my local friends I met in recovery, by 11 p.m. I start to tire. When I left my daughters at the club to retire for the evening, most of the adult drunkards were still being seduced into the late night by the alcohol they consumed.
The alcohol I once drank to keep the party going no longer has the same pull on me. I had no desire to have one drop of alcohol. The obsession just isn’t there. I much rather be in bed by 10.
My Alcohol Induced Past
For thirty plus years I had a problem with binge drinking. I would get caught up in the fun of drinking with my friends and the insanity of the alcohol would take over. At times I would simply turn into a lunatic.
Lunacy alone wasn’t enough for me to stop drinking. The fun outweighed what I knew to be bad. It took a traumatic personal event to say, “Enough is enough.” I no longer wanted to be that woman.
The alcohol is what put an end to that lifestyle. I haven’t shunned alcohol, but prefer to not binge on alcohol. That night I attended the club with my daughters and chose to not drink any alcohol.
Alcohol Induced Fun Doesn’t Just Affect Lunatics
The alcohol struggle is real and I am mindful that my problem isn’t just about binging, but one glass of wine can easily lead to two when I do not take my past problems seriously.
Last week I visited my girlfriend of thirty plus years at her vacation home in Vieques, Puerto Rico. We raised our children and over the years drank alcohol together. The two of us never binged on alcohol. Parenting alone led to our lunacy and alcohol was used to relax.
Overlooking the Caribbean Sea we sat and enjoyed a glass of wine with dinner. As we watched the sunset and the conversation flowed we ordered dessert, followed by one more glass of wine.
We both were having alcohol induced fun. Over a course of a couple hours I got caught up in my old ways. There was no need for an additional glass of wine, but I ordered it anyway.
The Hypocrisy
It isn’t difficult to be seduced into our old ways when alcohol is present. We returned to my friend’s house and stayed up late talking. Alcohol was available but we made a choice not to continue drinking.
Sobriety means something different to each person in recovery. And each person’s recovery is unique. Although at one time I struggled with binging on alcohol, my recovery is not focused on alcohol.
Sobriety Challenged vs. Sober-minded
In the Bible to be sober is marked by self-control and sound judgment. Even though I did not feel the effects of the alcohol, one glass of wine did turn into two so there went my self-control.
My daughters are enjoying life as I once did. It’s not for me to tell them how they should consume their alcohol or how it negatively is impacting their judgement. The best I can do is shadow good behavior by not being a lunatic, but a responsible person when it comes to alcohol.
More importantly I need to continue to work on the alcoholic related behaviors that keep me in recovery and strive to be a mother they admire.
Owning Our Alcohol Induced Behaviors
Alcohol is not the problem that led me down a path in need of recovery. My alcoholic behaviors, the reasons behind why I decided to abuse alcohol, needed to be addressed. My pride stood in the way of my recovery.
For the last three plus years I did a thorough introspection of my life. I revealed my unresolved issues that contributed to resentments and the need to numb myself with alcohol. I discovered true healing and made much needed lifestyle changes.
To successfully recover from our alcoholic past, we need to remove not just the consumption of alcohol, but blaming our problems on the alcohol. Then the lunatic will finally grow-up and learn to respect alcohol.
Note:
Alcoholism and sobriety should be treated differently for each person who chooses recovery. Many of my friends in recovery have decided to abstain from alcohol use all together. Addiction is real and many consider alcoholism a disease.
My recovery is focused on personal growth and to not be influenced into unsound judgement. Although I prefer non-alcoholic beer or mocktails, I will enjoy a glass of wine. I simply choose to not be a lunatic, but a responsible grown-up.
And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit,
Ephesians 5:18 ESV
The coming weeks I will dig into my past, share my story that led to my alcohol abuse and what recovery means to me.
Alcohol truly drives its victim into lunacy. The word of God and the Spirit of God rather align us with life--full life. Thanks for your article. You got a new subscriber. I also subscribed to your main website blog on WordPress.
You've done and are doing great work. Prayers as you continue to grow and share your story with others.